Still Learn and Grow

The busiest day I have had as a musician through the whole year has been Solo/Ensemble Festival: a full day of students singing and playing pieces of music prepared for a judge and possibly a small audience. I participated in eight events, overall learning 13 pieces of music. I had five acts as a vocalist, four collaborative pianists, three acts as a violinist, two lovely directors, and a partridge in pear tree–it was overwhelmingly awesome and beautifully exhausting. As my day at Solo/Ensemble was about halfway over, all was well until I came across something that not only didn't amuse me but also broke my heart . I ran into a student from a different school whom I had known from various other music events; the only thing–after years of "only" perfect ballots–this student was concerned with was getting a "Best of Center" rating for their solo (an honor distinguished to only one act during the day by the judge–this student hadn't achieved this yet). Thi...

Before I get into the specifics, there is something I want to clarify: I despise asking for help. There are three possible reasons for this: 1. There have been many times when the help is ineffective because I usually can't follow the process of what the teacher is talking about, and as a result, I get more confused. 2. As a child, I felt patronized when being given help. 3. I'm generally anxious about being an inconvenience to someone else, even if the person I'd be asking is a teacher. Generally, for most of the time I've been in high school, I almost never lost in the process of anything. If I got off course, usually the first explanation would get me sailing again. Math was definitely an area I didn't find too much trouble in until...*sigh*...vectors... (one thing to know for sure: 3 ...'s = 👎) Almost every day for this previous unit, I went to the teacher's desk during our work time in a panic. I felt super self conscious because I usually ...